I think we should be breeding dogs . Big, giant, horse-sized dogs. Dogs that are smart, but not too smart lest they try to kill us. Thick and built low to the ground like pit-bulls, but with strong backs so that we can ride them into battle. These dogs should have hearts that are easily removed so that they can be implanted with artificial ones, made from bulletproof steel and plastic. The steel they used to make tanks. We will then make bulletproof armor for this giant dogs, and saddles, and really light miniguns to place on their heads. These miniguns would be operate by a single thought or whatever it is that dogs have that are like human thoughts. You say “fire left”, and the dog turns his head and fires the gun at the enemy . You could then fire right. Both sides covered. All this while running into battle. When it got close you would be free to hack away at the enemy while the dog tore them to shreds with his massive jaws with stainless steel teeth. Yes, the dogs’ teeth could be removed and implanted with stainless steel ones. 

Other ideas:

Rocket packs
Flying giant Rottweillers with miniguns who could steer themselves in the air.

Remote controlled
The dog could have a speaker through which its trainer could give it orders. 

Possession
The dog could be implanted with a brain chip that would allow an “operator” to take control of its brain and direct it in highly technical tasks like programming computers. The trainer/operator could speak through the dogs mouth.

Invisible
Dogs that are sprayed with a special paint that renders them invisible. Until it’s too late.

Intelligence dogs
Dogs that can listen and retain human conversation and then make notes to transmit back to headquarters.

Sabotage
Normal-looking dogs that can pee acid on enemy aircraft thus making them useless or dangerous to operate.

Seduction dogs
Dogs that can seduce zoophiles.

Posted via web from lowlyserfdom | Comment »

8:04 am  •  24 January 2010  •  View comments