We used to have a girl who was paid 15.00 an hour just to give blow jobs to the health inspectors. Not that the place was filthy or anything, much the opposite, the boss ran a tight ship, but nobody else in town did, and the health inspectors were used to being able to extort money. Hector, the boss, found that he could save money by giving a particularly easy girl a raise and letting her take care of of the government. Sometimes they didn’t want blowjobs, though, just cash, and so we would kill them. Kill one health inspector and you didn’t have to buy ground beef or lard for a month.
One time a health inspector got rough with the blowjob girl, punching her in the face and that kind of thing, so Hector broke a mop handle over his knee and sodomized him in the walk-in freezer. He lubricated the stick with shortening. Later when the health inspector came with the police to press charges, the manager asked a dishwasher to come mop the floor in the front of the restaurant. The inspector saw the mop and ran away crying.
Raoul, one of the dishwasher, while having sex with his girlfriend as she made fries, jizzed in the fryer and discovered that sperm fries up crispy. I was told that it actually looked attractive. Golden brown. Nobody had the courage, or should I say balls, to try it.
If our drivers got stiffed we would often go collecting our money with ski-masks and shotguns. It wasn’t a big deal, we never had to actually shoot anybody. usually they paid up and gave us a good tip.
The restaurant was a haven for guys who were in love with their sisters. It’s not like Hector set it up that way or anything, it just happened after Bill, from England showed up with his large-boobed sister in tow, deciding that they weren’t going to keep the nature of their relationship from the world anymore. Hector never actually endorsed that kind of thing, he just hired Bill anyway. After that all kinds of brother sister romantic couples turned up at our doorstep. They didn’t all get hired but many opted to stay and eat. The restaurant became a shrine to brother and sister affairs.
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